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View Full Version : Theories to Purify Fiesta of all Noobs


mehe25
05-18-2009, 11:36 PM
Before reading you must know that this is all for fun and game XD


To get started, we all know noobs are filth to every game out there right? So I have created eight theories to purify our game of all noobs to the point of 99%.

The reason I can’t get the last 1% is due to the law of Gold Spammer which states that it is imposible for all Gold Spammers to have a life and move. It also states that Gold Spammers will have their arms chopped off if they move an inch and don’t have annoying gibberish names. Therefore you cannot get rid of Gold Spammers.

So I have done research and found that all true players can go on without using STRONG help such as cookies and extenders for a long time meaning they can use it but can go on without using it often. I have also done illegal tests on noobs in my space lab with my assistant Cercia and found out that under every SC noob armpit lies green-snot colored glowing crust of hell. I call the crust Nubblicles. This crust is a result of contamination of too much SC or noobness to the max and the contents of it are-IT IS SO TOXIC THAT IT CAN KILL THE NOOB ITSELF:

50%Extenders and cookies
And 50% being born a pure noob who doesn’t know how to play the game at all
Image:
http://www.dvminerals.com/img2007/M-313.jpg

But I found some use for it. Each 1 gram of nublicals explodes like a nuclear bomb at the heat of about 100 degrees which means we can enslave them to mine their own crust to use for nuclear energy(YAY!). But no, we need to destroy them…

First Theory: Reverse Nubmosis

My first theory is introduced some time ago and I call it Reverse Nubmosis. It deals with throwing the entire Fiesta population into a membrane which has holes small enough to let real gamers through who apparently are more thin and compact as apposed to the big fat noobs. These holes shall let the real gamers through and keep the big fat noobs out. When all the real gamers fall into the bucket we can let them free. But the membrane is carrying the entire population of noob in it therefore we can put them into a differen’t bucket and completely jail them in >=)

Image:
http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo311/mikeandamina/untitled-15.jpg?t=1242711630


Second Theory: Distilnub

Now, real gamers tend to become a gas, literally a gas, at a lower heat level than complete noobs. Real gamers will convert to being a gas at 50 degrees while noobs are at 90 degrees mainly because noobs are more hard and minerally. So, my theory is that we put the entire population into a pot and heat it up to 50 degrees, once all the true gamers become vapor then they will be captured and condensed inside a condenser where they become solid again! They will then slide down a slide from the GOOD GIRLS ALICINA trademark company into a bowl given to us by Ilovepink corporations.

Back at the pot, all the noobs will still be solid inside the pot and so turn up the heat to 100 degrees and they go out with a BOOM. The world will be happy 


Image:
http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo311/mikeandamina/untitled-16.jpg?t=1242711652

Third Theory: Sc Trap

Noobs know what Sc smells like; they can even smell it with their tongue! My research has shown that every noob can smell a single SC item or anything free at the distance of 100 light years and follow it to take it which is far than enough to work this theory.

So my plan is to place an extender inside a big cage inside a rocket. All noobs will follow into the rocket in attempt to take the extender inside the cage. Then we have Zeus press the lift-off button and it will fly to another online game. Hopefully they won’t know the origin of these noobs.

Image:
http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo311/mikeandamina/untitled-17.jpg?t=1242711669


Fourth Theory: Overdose of SC

Now this came up by accident due to my great assistant, CERCIA!! Apparently while we were doing tests on subject noob #5, she gave an overdose of SC which in turn created so much crust that the subject noob literally became a giant ball of nublicle. So my plan is to create a huge mound of SC somewhere far away and it will lure all noobs away since they smell at a farther distance than real-players. Then when they all get there they can fulfill all their noob dreams and become giant balls of nublicles.

After that happens, Spronekiller will be sacrificed to go in and heat it up to create a huge firework of nuclear explosion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thus purifying Fiesta of noobs getting rid of Spronekiller YAY!!!!!!!!!(jk lol)

Image:http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo311/mikeandamina/untitled-18.jpg?t=1242711690

Fifth Theory : Get Noob Detectors

Cercia and I have created a great triumph in detector technology that it can actually detect noobs! Once detected it will fire an anti-noob laser powered by Celtic_Princess’ great wisdom. These anti-noob lasers convert Celtics wisdom which possesses a rare matter destroying property that can’t usually be used normally without technology to convert her wisdom.

So we hook Celtic up with a helmet which sucks the infinite wisdom energy. It then converts it into anti-noob particles which on contact with positive noob-particles will completely obliterate it.

Image:
http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo311/mikeandamina/untitled-19.jpg?t=1242712608


So these are all my theories ^-^

O by the way, I just had a lot of time on my hands today.
We will add some new information if we find out any new information on noob research. Remember, your donations to Mehe & Cercia Research Base will lead us all into a better future :)

Antony_Aravind
05-19-2009, 01:15 AM
all lol................

grummin
05-19-2009, 04:17 AM
Theory 4, and only 4 for me- one reason: Anytime something goes boom, that's a bonus on top of any other benefit. Hell, it's a bonus even if there's not any other benefit, but that could just be me. :D

Although...

*grins mischievously*

...you opened up saying you had 8 theories, and only listed 5. If the last 3 turn up, and there's a more entertaining "boom" in one of them, my vote could change in a heartbeat. ;)

mehe25
05-19-2009, 06:55 AM
Theory 4, and only 4 for me- one reason: Anytime something goes boom, that's a bonus on top of any other benefit. Hell, it's a bonus even if there's not any other benefit, but that could just be me. :D

Although...

*grins mischievously*

...you opened up saying you had 8 theories, and only listed 5. If the last 3 turn up, and there's a more entertaining "boom" in one of them, my vote could change in a heartbeat. ;)

OoO

How did you know....

All I'm going to say is I have a bit more secretive theories which, yes, I will give out. The reason why they're so secretive is that they're differen't from the others-I'm more so leaning towards a lot of boom and side-effects.

silph
05-19-2009, 07:28 AM
I have a theory! Get all non noob guilds to form an anti noob alliance! Kill all noobs with rocket launchers and guided missiles. As for my choice however of the options kill get a few with each.

ras-blackfire
05-19-2009, 07:42 AM
o.o so much reading *died at the beginning already* x.x

silph
05-19-2009, 07:42 AM
lol you dont like to read?

grummin
05-19-2009, 09:43 AM
How did you know....

Know what? That there were more theories? Because you said so.

That the extras had boom? Just hopeful thinking on my part. Lucky guess. :D

All I'm going to say is I have a bit more secretive theories which, yes, I will give out. The reason why they're so secretive is that they're differen't from the others-I'm more so leaning towards a lot of boom and side-effects.

Hmmm...SC trap in remote area, causing looooong mover train of noobs, then set off chain reaction like string of massive firecrackers...
*begins drooling like Homer Simpson* mmmmm...noob-boom...

silph
05-19-2009, 09:49 AM
uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh dohnuts! Noobs should be hunted down and put in stocks and publically whipped!!! the nubness shall bleed outta them

falapt
05-19-2009, 11:28 AM
o.o so much reading *died at the beginning already* x.x

^^^^ x2 I started reading & then scrolled down to c if there was someone feeling like me

silph
05-19-2009, 11:30 AM
lol lazy people are phail

falapt
05-19-2009, 11:31 AM
nah, they can change

silph
05-19-2009, 11:31 AM
can you falaper?

falapt
05-19-2009, 11:32 AM
Sure I can

silph
05-19-2009, 02:32 PM
lies

10char

wraithwail
05-21-2009, 08:08 AM
Anyone can change, as for the topic well i am not sure even if you do there will be more.